Sunday, March 29, 2009

building my wings...blogaversary week giveaway...UPDATE!!


my 3rd blogaversary is this week...i will be having a BIG GiVe AwAy ...prints of the works on this post to three lucky a comment you MuST tell me how you built Your Wings...if you become a follower of this blog at top right, you get an extra entry...if you tweet about it or facebook about it, you will get an extra chance...just let me know in your comment what you are doing!!!...1 entry per person please (i will add the extra's before i pick)...please spread the word!!! i will announce the winners on wednesday!!!

you can share it by clicking the share this link right now...

'golden wings' - 2009 venetian plaster, acrylics, 18K gold on canvas
WINNER 9 - Carla J Schuchman
"Do what you love, and love what you do. DO WHAT YOU LOVE, AND LOVE WHAT YOU DO!...I want you to go to the edge of the cliff, jump off, and grow your wings on the way down. Don't worry about having the wings, they'll come." -Ray Bradbury
so i am in the process of building my wings...i jumped off that cliff earlier this week...and i have not hit the ground as yet!!!

'on silvered wings' - 2009 plaster, acrylics on canvas
WINNER 18 - tlc illustration tara

and this free fall seems to be freeing me...

opening me wide to ALL the possibilities

of my LiFE...

and my HerT...

have you ever just stepped off the edge,
without a plan or a safety net...
and met your best self on the way down?

i am finding


and purpose

and wild abundant joyfulness

my wings have indeed come
and my eyes are seeing with new clarity
all that lies before me....

'acceptance" 2009 plaster, acrylics on canvas
WINNER 13 -rochambeau constance

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. -Marcel Proust

Friday, March 27, 2009

beautiful life friday...

every morning i go down by the sea

to see what gifts God left for me

sometimes the bounty is far and wide

and sometimes it's hidden within the tide

and sometimes a gift so fine, so rare

appears for all to see and share


below are my favorite finds...i call angel wings...broken pieces of shell that i use in my art...

melissa of the inspired room hosts beautiful life friday....please visit her blog

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

my dark night of the soul...

I have been doing heavy soul work during this Lenten season. I have extended my morning meditation/prayer time and, as a result, I believe that I have entered my dark night of the soul. I bring this here because I am called to do so...if you read on it is because you are called to do so...


I was wounded as a child-not physically or sexually, but emotionally. I know you are saying, "Who wasn't Rebecca?" And that is a valid question...but I am feeling the need to go on with this anyway.

I was wounded by my father who was emotionally detached, wanted a son when I was born, and often stated that I was "worthless." My mother overcompensated by holding on tightly to me, yet she was emotionally distant also. This disconnect with my father led me into relationships with men who were emotionally detached from me and could never give me the love I so craved. Yet I returned again and again because I believed that this was all I deserved.

I seek out sources to fill that hole deep in my soul. Adulation, praise, winning, success...all were, and still are to some extent, my drug of choice. I must continually be filled with massive overdoses of esteem in order to function. Like a sad puppy, if you give praise, I will perform for you forever regardless of the neglect or pain you inflict.

I have accepted this woundedness in my psyche and my mind, but I am still wounded in my heart and my soul. This is what I came away with during my morning meditation today. It is stuff I have been dealing with for may years. It is why I had built up an overabundance worldly stuff - because it meant love to me. And loosing it means a failure and another loss of love to me.

I am too smart to truly believe this, you might say; yet I repeatedly come from this place of need. And when a person operates their lives from this place of lack, it shows somehow.

I was able to keep a glossed-over facade for most of my life. My mother taught me to splash my face, put on some lipstick and 'pretend' everything is all right. If I pretended hard enough and long enough, I usually began to believe it. But reality intervened last year and blew my world, pretense and all, into a million tiny pieces. So many pieces in fact, that I probably will never be able to gather them all back together.

Yesterday's meditation was about the puzzle of my life. All those tiny pieces. The meditation brought me to the edge of a precipice with Jesus. He showed me the puzzle that is my life. I saw as far as my eyes could see an incomplete puzzle. I was carrying a massively large, heavy puzzle piece on my back. It was in the form of a large slab of stone. I was hunched over by the weight of this piece and labored ever so slowly to take it to the place it fits. It was breaking my back to carry it.

I understood that I would never complete this puzzle in my life. I have always wanted to know why things are the way they are. I am overly curious to a fault. He said, "You don't need to know the answers to begin..." to put my life together, to heal??? are the questions I am left to answer.

My life had two distinct divisions...before I broke my neck and after I broke my neck. The after has been an uphill climb filled with pain, sometimes bearable and other times unthinkable. Yet I live and walk and breathe...

I am challenged to find joy in my burdens and suffering. Jesus said to me clearly, "In your suffering others will find strength." My journey is a steep climb with heavy burdens. The path is rocky with many stumbles and falls. If my journey will give others hope then I must put it out there. So I share my dark night of the soul with you today as vulnerable and as raw as it feels to do so...

Millions of enlightened souls have entered their own dark night of the soul. This is where the journey leads you. It is uncomfortable and frightening but very necessary to grow into our spiritual maturity. Once in spiritual maturity we are free to co-create with God and the universe with the gift that is uniquely our own.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

the twiglettes burst forth...

a repeat post and update...

bed photo:

this did look is all it took....this very picture of a magnificent metalwork bed by shawn lovell...inspired a whole new stream of creativity for me...

upon seeing this dreamy bed....i immediately took up my pencil and began sketching...before i knew what happened...twiggie and sprig were born...they sprung to life out of the end of my graphite...just as a branch emerges from a tree...

re-introducing the twigles...

twiggie and sprig

then i was off to find just the right twiglet...for the mixed media pieces i will reveal in the near took some doing...but on this walkway to the beach i found just the right twigs....from a a gnarled beach tree...the tiny twigs just called, "make wings out of me".

i am fascinated with the possibilities of many little time...

these are the first portraits from 'the twigles' series...they are so adorably cute...twiggie is a little shy and soft spoken...while sprig is a tomboy wanna a new sibling...and soon to be a what's the story...

In the valley of Barque on the banks of the Seeda River lives a family of twiggles named Twiggleberry-Dew...a most curious family to be sure.

To the real world a twiggle is a triangular wiggle, but this is a curious world, and nothing is as it seems. Between remarkable and extraordinary are the tales, which are woven on the loom of Leavern, a most curious twiggle elder. And we visit the unconventional shoppe of Leavern today….

You enter the shop underneath a purple leaf-shaped sign with a large letter L on both sides. To the left as you enter is a large loom that covers the front window of the shoppe overlooking the river. Seated at the loom is a small purple-haired woman singing loudly as she spins.

Without missing a single beat she says, “Welcome” and smiles a most curious smile and her eyes twinkle with mischief. She makes a waving motion with her left had that conveys the message that the shoppe is to be investigated, perused and enjoyed. Still singing and clanging the loom in rhythm, one cannot help but feel curious.

I am still standing in the doorway when I notice that the loom does not have fabric or threads, but a wondrous amalgamation of words and imagination coupled with heart, soul and creativity.

She notices my curious eyes; for this is unlike anything I have ever seen. “The warp is made of imagination and the shuttle is loaded with words spun from the heart,” she explains. Her gaze crosses the room to a group of young maidens spinning. They appeared to be talking as they spun, but not to one another. They were in a trance-like state and were speaking to themselves or to their individual muses, I know not which. No, they were not speaking at all…but the results of their spinning, a marvelous blend of words, was.

Yet it was not disconcerting at all, this jumble of words spilling forth from the spinning wheels…it was melodious and easy on the ear. It made one feel mellow and content.

As I watched in astonishment, I realized that I was immersed in wonderment in the curious Valley of Barque... to be continued...learn how they get their wings...
the original paintings and prints will be available next week on boutique cre8tiva...along with a few more surprises...

this is sprout...the newest sibling...she is the fun party girl...

i have been so out of focus recently...i had a little time to reflect and restore this week...what i do know is that God loves me...and i believe that He has a great plan for my life...i don't know what He i am going to trust Him to get me there...this is a new life and a new day and i must live it...and stand i my truth...the new and improved rebecca is journeying forth...Cre8Tiva in tow...

Pleae visit my other blog The Artist as a Spiritual Explorer for inspiration for the soul...

Friday, March 13, 2009

Do You Know What I Do???

Well do you??? If you have been reading my blog for a while you should know...unless I have not been so good about telling you about my Cre8Tive Businesses...after all I am a Cre8Tive Entrepreneur....

Do your readers know about your home business?
adapted from quiz by naomi dunford @ itty biz

Here's the game and challenge...answer the following in a blog post...Just Do It...NOW!!!! Don't forget to leave a comment with a link back to your answers!!!
  1. What’s your game? What do you do?
  2. Why do you do it? Do you love it, or do you just have one of those knacks?
  3. Who are your customers? What kind of people would need or want what you offer?
  4. What’s your marketing USP? Why should I buy from you instead of the others?
  5. What’s next for you? What’s the big plan?
So here are my answers....let me know if you knew what I do...I will be most interested in the answer and to find out what you do...

What’s Cre8Tiva/Rebecca's game? (btw - these are my elevator speeches)
I’m a midwife for small, sole-proprietor creative entrepreneurs. I help them birth their business idea all the way from dream through success. 
As a designer and wordsmith...I design and develop innovative business communication (print and web) to help creative entrepreneurs find ways to double their income and have fun doing what they love.  
What do I do?
As a creative entrepreneur, I understand the needs of the small creative business. Together we create an inspired, inventive, original, and clever action plan tailored to those specific needs. Then we walk your action plan together...with me as the companion, cheerleader and tough love advisor.

We develop your brand identity by creating the right marketing materials, with the right words to attract the right clients, achieve your business dreams and ensure your business gets noticed, sounds good and sells more. We specialize in the creation of an appealing image with compelling content that will articulate your vision and engage your audience.

Your package is customized to fit your budget and needs. Everything is possible: from website and/or blog design and content development, brand identity to collateral pieces, newsletter creation to video production. 

Why do I do it? 
I have a passion to succeed and to help others succeed doing what they love. My motto is no harder to do what you love than to do what you don't... I have one life empower you to do what you love for the rest of your life. I have been on a blessed journey for over 35 years, learning much along the way. I love to share that creative business knowledge with you on your journey to self-employment.
Who are my customers? What kind of people would need or want what I offer?
Our customers simply want to do what they love and earn a living doing it. 

Artisans and craftspeople, from any discipline, can create all day but usually have trouble selling themselves and the work of their hands. We can change that.
What’s my marketing USP (Unique Selling Proposition)? Why should you buy from me instead of the other firms?
As a boutique design firm, REP Studios, Inc. brings expertise instead of process, ways of thinking instead of methodologies. We are willing to push the envelope creatively. Our team possesses specialized design, writing, and branding skills and has a lot of experience as a small, sole-proprietor creative entrepreneurs.

Rebecca, a 35-year professional artist and business owner, leads the way with specific expertise as a veteran creative entrepreneur. This speciality knowledge brings more credibility to the table—as creative business success is our chief focus.

There are many advantages to working with a boutique firm: A more intimate connection with the designer and a designer who picks up her own phone. Your experience will be more personal and satisfying.

What do you need from your design service provider? Do you need to fix a problem; create a brand, or publish a book? Our mission and our legacy is to help shape your aspirations into a profit-making business.

Are you looking for a long-term, strategic partnership or are you looking for someone to build a working prototype and bill you for it? REP Studios offer both.
What’s next for Cre8Tiva and Rebecca?
  1. Sell my art on Etsy
  2. New websites up and running - U Be Creative and Art as Prayer
  3. Tutorial and workshop videos
  4. eBooks...I have written several books, thousands of articles, and millions of words in my lifetime. Convert them to e-books
  5. Continue developing the Cre8Tiva brand
What’s the big plan?
Keep on doing what I love and helping you do it too! Launch The Artist as a Spiritual Traveler.
This was a great exercise for me helped me clarify and quantify some business plans. I have been doing a SWOT Analysis...a strategic planning method used to evaluate the Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats involved in a project or in a business venture. It involves specifying the objective and identifying the internal and external factors that are favourable and unfavourable to achieving that objective. The technique is credited to Albert Humphrey, who led a research project at Stanford University in the 1960s and 1970s using data from Fortune 500 companies. I will show what I did in my next post...

please take a moment to become a fan of my blog if you like what you at the top of the right column...have a gr8 weekend

Saturday, March 7, 2009

this door is closed...move on...

I understand that I cannot open a door God has closed…yet I have been wrestling/fighting/tugging, even to the point of laying prostrate in the way of, trying to keep a door open that God has already closed…tightly. This is what I have been doing for more than a year now. Do you think perhaps it is time for a dose of acceptance?

Oh boy this has been a hard life lesson to learn. It is not that I am pig-headed, although some might disagree. It is that I so desperately want to keep that door open that I would endure any amount of pain in order to do so. I have cajoled/begged/cried buckets of tears and still that door remains closed to me. Permanently!

Why has it been so hard for me to move on? This is a question not easily answered without a lot of inward reflection and prayer…and much suffering.

I am not by nature a quitter… am I quitting if I accept? Acceptance means the act of accepting or receiving; approval; state of accepting or believing in something. Steve Pavlina says, “Acceptance means that you perceive reality accurately and consciously acknowledge what you perceive.”

Well there’s the rub…do I perceive reality accurately?

At this point in time I am unsure of that…but I do believe that acceptance ‘opens the door’ to change…it allows me to be okay right now, before I get through this transition. Truly when one door closes another opens…

I am beginning to see the possibilities that I was blind to before acceptance started to creep into my psyche. I am finding that acceptance is the very first step on a long journey into the unknown…. once I am on the other side of that closed door for good…

please take a moment to become a fan of my blog if you like what you at the top of the right column...

for more about this topic please visit  my other blog

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

heart broken open...

i was going to post the results of my weekend adventure with the twiggleberry-dews, but that will have to wait until tomorrow...i had such a profound experience during my meditation this morning, i feel compelled and led to share a portion of the awakening...

'heart broken open' - 2009, journal sketch

i do not usually bring something so personal to this place but i am encouraged to believe that it just might help others who are struggling with something at this very moment...

during my meditation i was feeling heartbroken, desolate and in pain...both physically and i look inward, i find that i am unable to ask for help and, even when it is offered, i find it difficult to accept...yet, i have the capacity to willingly offer and give help as empathy is a large thread running through my nature...and i admit that i might, just might, need help at this time...

while journaling after my meditation this morning, i had a moment of clarity when i wrote, "the brokenness of my heart might, just might, be necessary for me to open my heart and accept help from God, friends, and even the universe."...albeit a forced opening, but an opening nonetheless....

'heart in a box' - 2007, acrylic on paper

now this opening of my heart is extremely, it is excruciatingly painful to the point i want to keep my heart in a box so it will be protected (actually it has been in a box for most of my can read about it here and here...and even here...I write about trust issues a lot)

so my heart must be broken in order for it to heal...healing comes on gentle whispers to me, not in a roaring flood...healing is a gradual, sometimes difficult and almost always painful, journey for me...

'pieces of my heart' - 2009 acrylic on canvas

this opening up and pouring forth from my heart to yours is perhaps necessary for my healing to begin for a step toward acceptance begins the long journey into healing...from what was a small fissure, the tiny crack in my heart seemed to grow and the pieces of my heart were flung a million tiny stars that blanket the sky on a clear night....

gathering these pieces of my heart together, fusing and mending it slowly is where the healing is leading me...that tiny fissure that i thought was bad and frightened me at first perhaps best viewed as a good thing, a necessary thing...for true authentic healing comes by going through the pain and coming out on the other side better...stronger...more alive...

i am not writing today in sadness or self-pity...that road has taken me nowhere over the past year...i write wholly within acceptance and awareness of my smallness in this vast universe of ours...embracing the fact that i am in the midst of spirit and my life...and it is painful...

my heart is indeed broken open...pouring forth to those of you who are ready to hear my story...and begin your own journey...

if you like this post and other here, i would love you to become a follower of my blog...please click the link at top right column...and i promise to keep the posts thoughtful and artful...